Wow it's been four long years. Here's a little about what's been going on with me... all the ups & downs. Ups: I have a great boyfriend. I have wonderful, smart kids. I have family & friends who mean the world to me and care about me. Downs: I lost my dad March 2014. My grandma is again fighting cancer and as I type this it isn't looking good. I'm severely obese with a BMI over 48. But here's the thing.... that last one I have the power to change. I am changing it! I've working hard over the last 6 months (with some failures here & there) to lose 25lbs. That's a big deal for me. I'm in talks with my primary doctor about starting the process of going through weight loss surgery. This scares me because all I've ever known is being fat. But I'm ready to make the change. Losing my dad has made me so aware of my own mistakes. I don't want to miss seeing my kids graduate, get married or have kids. So this is it.... today is a new day.